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Harry and Ginny > Make Yourself At Home > Procrastination Station
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Imogen
This was Erin's suggestion, and I love it! Dobby's driving me nuts, and probably will for most of this fic. So the plan is - to ease a little frustration - to kill Dobby off in this thread with as many variations and mutilations as possible. Please feel free to join in.

Dobby was strolling down Diagon Alley with the key to Dumbledore's vault clutched tightly in his fingers. Dumbledore had entrusted him with this mission and it was important that he did as much as possible to worry all of Imogen's readers that Harry was about to die.
"Such an honour it is!" he squeaked to himself, delighted that he'd eventually made it into one of the stories.
He turned left, and was just wandering past Magical Musical Moments when a loud groaning noice caught his attention. A dark shadow loomed over him, swaying in the wind and the creaking intensified.
Slowly the little house elf looked up with huge eyes like surprised saucers. The walls of the building towered above him and finally his eyes alighted on a large, black, heavy Steinway piano suspended from a very rickety pulley.
The rope was fraying. Slowly. Slowly to the final strand.
Dobby gulped.
There was a rush of air.
Squelch!
nome
Harry sighed. The letter in his hand, in a tiny squiggly hand written in purple, was so full of dire dooms and macabre predictions it would have driven Trelawney to tears of awe. Of course, that was after she'd deciphered the concepts hidden in grammar that made Ron wince.

"Hedwig, if you see him coming before I do, keep him out of here," Harry said with exasperation. "I don't want to spend a night regrowing every bone in my body." Hedwig had been terribly sick recently, and was not in a good mood. Swooping from a perch he'd set up in a high corner, she ripped the letter from his hand and in a few moments left it as confetti. Hooting emphatically, she left the room presumably for a bit of hunting.

Hedwig WAS hunting. She'd been deathly sick because of a house-elf spell meant for Harry, and now had permission to do something about it...

Dobby, making his irritatingly airy way towards Privet drive, didn't see the bird until it was too late. When she gave a hoot of triumph, he turned his watery saucer-eyes up, and...

(loud hoots and squeals, accompanied by icky owl-violence sounds)
Yoda
While normally highly supportive of Dobby, him being a slightly unhinged version of my me, I find this thread absolutely brilliant. I've set mine actually in Gringotts:

Yoda

PS: This is dedicated to my five o'clock lecture of evil.


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

'Such a maze it is!' Dobby squeaked to himself as he wandered through the caverns beneath Gringotts. 'Left it is right and right then left it is right, or it is right then right and left then right it is?' he tried, frantically trying to remember the route the goblin had given him.

Taking a left that is right, Dobby strolled nonchalantly down the passage only to find himself in darkness. 'Wrong this is,' he squeaked nervously, turning around to see that the torches behind him had also extinguished. 'Very wrong it is.'

Not for the first time Dobby cursed his magic for not letting him learn how to conjour a fire. A flicker caught his eye though, and set in the entrance to a passage he saw a flame dancing steadily. With an excited squeak he ran towards the flame, leaning against the rough wall beside it and pulling out his map.

An interesting candle it is Dobby thought, staring up at the flame. It was quite strong for a candle, and seemed to be surrounded by dripping liquid that caught alight to fizz out. Peering into the alcove, Dobby saw that a leaky pipe was the source, and had sprayed the liquid all over the serrated edges of the alcove.

'Squeak.' Said Dobby.

'Yawn.' Said the dragon.
Ashwinder
I would just like to state for the record that I think the ultimate demise for Dobby would be to have a giant foot come out of the sky and stomp on him.
Yoda
I would like to request that the theme to Monty Python's Flying Circus be played when Ashwinder's suggestion is used biggrin.gif

Yoda
nome
Giant foot? do we speak of Hagrid?



*MP theme in background*

And Dobby, small creature he that is with two socks from great Harry Potter sir, scurried through the maze of giant orange balls, until, suddenly out of the sky, a giant bare foot plunges.

Squish.

"Ruddy little bugs, can't hardly seem down there, 'mong the pumpkins an' all. Oh, well. Fang! Here, boy!"
bart
one of the things Harry Potter insisted on in his and Ginny’s new house was an electricity supply, which impressed Mr Weasley no end and he had already booked a week off work "to come and help them settle in" which of cause everyone else knew meant to come and play!

Something Harry liked to do was listen to music when he was in the bath, and so Dobby was just setting up the CD player [nicked from Dudley on his last visit] with his favourite album, when the door bell went, causing Dobby to jump and knock it to the hot foamy water, caught between answering the door and rescuing the CD player, he quickly leant over and put his hand in the water to find the player........................ :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
BJH
"Oh, what is we to do?" moaned little Winky. "The dinner is to start soon and we is out of meat."

"Maybe they is not being too hungry tonight," one of the other house-elves said hopefully.

"NO!" Dobby screamed in a voice so high and shrill that even the other house-elves covered their ears. "Harry Potter must have a proper dinner. We is must to find him some meat!'

Winky looked over at him and replied, "You is right, Dobby, and I know just where to find some."

Saying this, she picked up a razor-sharp cleaver and proceeded to get more than enough meat to feed all the Gryffindors.

BJ
Imogen
FOFLOL - these are brilliant! BJ has inspired me:
***

"Dobby is promising not to tell," the house elf said in a wavering voice, looking at Harry. "Oh Sir, you is not wanting Dobby to betray Dumbledore."
"I want to know what's going on," Harry yelled at the top of his voice. "You've got a key, Dumbledore's told you something and I WANT TO KNOW WHY I'M IN MORTAL PERIL!"
"Your wand," Dobby whispered, his saucer eyes shifting uneasily between Harry and Ron. "I is telling you that..."
And with a sudden jerk the elf propelled himself into the cafe's kitchen and began to bang his head against the oven yelling, "Bad Dobby! Bad Dobby!"
Suddenly he felt a jerk on his clothing like a Port Key and he was plunged into total darkness with a clang. There was a hiss, a smell of gas and a roar of violet flames.
"Roast Elf for tonight's special," the chef roared.
Helen
Dobby was walking up the side of Cairngorm, In the snow underneath the Railway Line, when suddenly a train came over the rails that lay baove him. He carried on right up to the top. Unable to see for the fog. On the top harry noticed the silly elf and went and over to a cliff and threw him off. And that was the end of this Dobby.

Notes:
Cairngorm - Scotlands Fifth Higest Mountain, Part of the Grampian range. The cliff is often called Devils Gorge. It has a furnicular railway, which their will be enough room for dobby to walk underneath the tracks. Oh and it is about to be come a National park.
nome
Dobby whimpered in joy as he read the letter. Washing Machines United had heard about his love of socks, and was going to send him some for Christmas! He'd always asked for socks for Christmas and now, without him saying anything, kind and generous heroic people were giving him some just to make him happy!

His eyes grew wide as he reread the last bit, and saw the spot he was to touch for delivery. He had to bring the letter up close to his face to read the small instructions, and the tip of his long nose brushed it.

It is rather easy to suffocate underneath six million mismatched socks.
bart
Harry was stressed, it was Ginny’s birthday and he had forgotten all about it, luckily although he did not now how, he had got away with saying her "surprise" present would be there when she came home from Hogwarts that evening, which was why he could now be found doing a particularly delicate bit of charm work which required the utmost concentration.

Suddenly his door slammed open, putting his wand down he swung round in anger, NOT NOW DOBBY! "But Mr Harry Potter Sir, Dobby has an important message from his wheezy sir!" "Great just great thought" Harry as he picked up his wand, and turning back to his work said "two minutes Dobby that’s all I ask" and went back to work, forgetting in his rush to get done, that his new wand required that little extra bit of concentration and control. When the smoke cleared Harry noticed bits of Ginny’s present covered just about every surface in the room

"Oh *@#*$%£$$%$%**%!!!!!" cursed Harry throwing his wand across the room with some force, noting with some pleasure the sound it made as it impaled itself in the door, if he had been listening even more he would have heard the small squelch just before the thud of it hitting the door.

Remembering that Dobby had entered a moment earlier with a message for him he turned round to see a rather shocked house elf dangling a couple of inches of the floor.....................................
Julephenia
Harry woke suddenly. There was something staring at him in the dark.

And it wasn't Ginny.

Oh, no. Ginny's gaze felt warm and wonderful. Loving. Healthy.

This gaze felt annoying. Annoying and anxious and fearful and full of important things to say.

"DOBBY!" he hissed, desperate not to wake Ginny and Hope.

"I is come to warn you, sir!" the elf squeaked.

"Try another line, Dobby, you already used that one in Book Two!" Harry said through clenched teeth.

"You is in MORTAL PERIL, Harry Potter, sir, and I is to save you, sir!" Dobby nodded his head mournfully.

"Didn't I *tell* you *never* to try and save my life again?" Harry said, momentarily mixing up the books and the movie, as it was 3:30 in the morning.

Dobby's head wavered toward the wall. "I knows that, sir, and I is sorry... but Dobby must do his duty, sir, and Harry Potter is stopping Dobby from his duty!"

Harry reached out and grabbed Dobby by the neck.

"I don't bloody *care* about your duty! LEAVE. ME. ALONE."

The elf squeaked, trying to get air.

"Oh, not using your magic now, are you, Dobby?" Harry hissed maliciously. "I promised I'd strangle you once, and I *never* break a promise!"

The elf gasped for air, turning a strange shade of teal.

Harry grinned as Dobby's eyes watered and bulged.

"YES!" he screamed, forgetting his wife and daughter were sleeping.

"I KILLED HIM! He's GONE! GONE, I TELL YOU! GONE!"

"Harry?"

(On perusal, I really got into homicidal Harry, didn't I? Sorry, Imogen!)

Becky, yeah, it's that time of morning... and it's been a rough night
magoo42
Dobby the house elf was wondering along, driving people crazy with his annoying voice, when he ran into a rather strange creature.

"Mesa Jar Jar Binks," it said in an outrageous accent. "Mesa an evil creature. Mesa responsible for all the evil in mesa's universe."

Dobby was horrified and tried to run away. But Jar Jar caught him. In desperation, Dobby used his magic to try to blow Jar Jar up. It worked, but Dobby was disintegrated along with it.

And all the people cheered, for the universe had been rid of all evil anoying false muppets.

~ami~ who watched episode I again this week for no good reason...
nome
A boisterous crowd surged along, carrying a small green thing with a hat, towards a man releasing owls with coconuts...

"We've got a witch! We've got a witch! May we burn her?"
"How do you know she is a witch?"
"She looks like one!"
"Bring her foward!"
The small green thing trembles. "I is not a witch, I is not a witch! I is not even female, sir!"
"But you are dressed as one!"
"They is dressing me up like this, sir! And this hat on Dobby's head is not being Dobby's hat, sir, but was set there by... bad Dobby! bad Dobby!" The small green thing slammed its head against the edge of a firepit. Unfortunately, it knocked itself unconcious and fell in.
"I suppose the arguments over, then," said the judge absentmindedly, "but that sizzling... it seems to be bothering the owls, and I'm not sure whether one will be able to carry a whole coconut. Maybe if two carried it together..."
nome
You know, I always thought Winky was less irritating. Maybe Imogen really COULD kill off Dobby and he could've confided in Winky, who continues the work in a slightly less annoying fashion.

:twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

Nome.
Julephenia
Nome, darling, what happened to the Newt?

I guess it got better, no?

Becky, starting to figure out Monty Python references - and Imogen, having Dobby confide in Winky *does* give you an out....
nome
Now, if we wanted to be really painful, we could insert the lines:

"It turned me into a sock!"
"A sock?"
*pause*
"I got sweater."


ooh. *wince* laugh.gif
Nome.
BJH
I got sweater!!! Oh GROAN.

How about after Imogen kills Dobby she puts him into an owl cage and nails him to a perch there? This way he can still be a part of the story but he just wouldn't be able to talk, not to mention fulfilled a portion of the Monty Python requirements.

"Excuse me, is that a house-elf?"

"A Norwegian Blue...beautiful plummage."

BJ
Julephenia
Ow.

Just ow.

NOME!

Hmmm... Dobby in an owl cage... now *that* would be fun.

But would Hedwig tolerate it?

What about Hermione?

Becky, broke her friend
nome
Dobby scurried down the slope towards the cave, the wizened old man's warnings unheeded. He skirted a particularily large pile of bones and spotted something white flying for his neck...

And another creature fell prey to the evil plot bunny of Caer Bannog.

Nome. :twisted:
Yoda
'I doubt it will make much difference,' said Professor McGonagall coldly, 'unless a mad axe-man is waiting outside the doors to slaughter the first into the Entrance Hall.'

Even Ron laughed. Professor Trewlawney looked highly affronted...

...[Harry and Ron] Made their way into the Entrance Hall, which was completely devoid of mad axe-men.

Climbing the stairs, they did not see the small round head roll out of the shadows, coming to a rest with saucer-sized eyes open in shock.

----------------------------------
Edit: Forgot to mention (of all things) that this is taken from the Christmas feast in PoA - up until the rolling head that is biggrin.gif

Yoda; only responsible for the rolling head.
jamesbow
"Dobby was bad, Mr. Potter, sir! Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!" The squirrelly elf began beating his head against a handy metal canister.

Harry and Ginny's eyes went wide. Without a signal, they turned and ran for their lives.

Behind them, Dobby kept punishing himself. "Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!" Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!

BOOM!

Ginny picked herself up and helped Harry to his feet as debris showered down all around them. "Harry, I told you it was a mistake to meet Dobby in a munitions factory!"[/i]
nome
Dobby scampered, his very footsteps irritating nearby shoppers. He was on his way to Gringotts on a very important mission! His eyes were shining with honored tears as he hurried along...

He never realized he was turning down an alley he'd always avoided. His last thoughts were filled with glory and praise for Dumbledore. He never knew he'd been snatched out of the alley and liquidated by a dirty old man for use in a potion.

Knockturn Alley shoppers never batted an eye as they bought the professed cure-all, 'Elf Elixir', but an eye that had been missed in liquidation did.



Are we sick and twisted, or is it just my imagination?

Nome, responsible for everything, minus any rolling heads that snuck in. She looks back, and supposes none did.

So...

Nome, from her sick and twisted lair.
Julephenia
Dobby the House-Elf was hurrying along the corridors of Hogwarts, worrying about his favorite student, Harry Potter. It seemed Harry Potter was always getting into trouble - or rather, trouble was getting into him.

Yet there was nothing poor Dobby could do about it, except to scurry to and fro, annoying the daylights out of poor Mr. Potter.

"Psst!"

Dobby jumped.

"Hey, you, Dobby!"

"Who is speaking to Dobby? Dobby is not looking for trouble, no. Dobby is looking for Harry Potter!"

An exasperated sigh. "You are ALWAYS looking for Harry Potter. Give the kid a break and try to help other kids around here for once, will you?"

"Dobby doesn't know any other students, Miss," for Dobby was sure it was a girl speaking. "Dobby only knows Harry Potter's Weezey, and Weezey's Miss, and Harry Potter's Miss Weezey!"

"Yeah, don't we all. Anyway, you don't know me, but you WILL know me!"

"What does Miss mean about Dobby will?" the elf backed up nervously, as a slight brown-haired girl emerged from the shadows.

"I'm a - erm - *fan* of Harry's. I think he's quite nice, and I don't want to hurt him. But I need your help," she spoke quickly and quietly.

"You is NOT a student, Miss! Miss doesn't have a uniform!" Dobby was very scared now.

"No, I'm not a Hogwarts student, but I know all about it. I just need your help on this one little thing..." She looked nice, to Dobby. And she didn't hit Dobby like the Malfoys had.

Dobby considered.

"Please? It's for Harry..."

"OH! It's for Harry Potter! Dobby will do ANYTHING for Harry Potter, Miss!"

"Figures. OK, here." She handed him a sheet of paper, entitled "Introduction to Philosophy: Take-Home Final Exam".

Dobby took one look at the questions, and his head exploded.

The girl laughed, grabbed the paper, and vanished, back to her desk at college.



Becky, three guesses what she's trying to do
rdehwyll
"Oh, Dobby, would you come in here a minute?"

"Yes Miss Granger, I is here."

"Ive been doing some research, and I found out some bad news."

"Bad news? Dobby doesn't like bad news..."

"Well, in any case, I'm abandoning S.P.E.W."

"Why is that?"

"Because I've found out that freed house elves implode!"

"That's not possible -- Dobby is free and--"

SPLORK!!!
Willow
lol! ive had such fun reading these...although i cant think of one to write myself wink.gif
USMCDevilDog
The smell of brimstone was in the atmosphere. Harry would just have to get over with it and cast the One Pair of Socks into the fiery chasm. "Harry Potter sir," squeaked Dobb from behind him. "Don't do it! Dont destrotys my Ahh! No!" To Harry's delight, Dobby the house elf dove into the fire shrieking the last words Harry would hear from that annoying elf. "PRECIOUSSS!"
Willow
laugh.gif i like the precciousss...part, very gollum like smile.gif
Willow
Dobby walked up the charms corrider as usual to tend to the fires, in the professers quarters. He entered. He noticed a pair of socks on a washing line.
'socksssss' cried dobby, 'poor poor socks, hung out on a line'
Dobby didn't see the black shadow behing him until it was too late.
The axe fell.
'poor poor Dobby, hung out on a line......'
bart
Ah the "Dobby meets his doom!" thread, the joys!, the memories!

but something tells me it would be better off in the General Discussion forum, so thats where it's off biggrin.gif

bart
PlaidPhoenix
I've never seen this thread before.... laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif



----

Dobby was so happy, Harry Potter and his Wheezy were getting married. AGAIN! And kind Harry Potter, generous Harry Potter, Harry Potter who was always kind to those who were beneath him had asked Dobby to help organize the festivities. Dobby was estatic, that is until he realized there was a chair missing from the main table.

"No no, this is not doing well for Harry Potter and his Wheezy!" Dobby exclaimed. Dobby looked high, Dobby looked low, Dobby looked near, Dobby looked far, but Dobby could not find the chair missing from the table. Not wanting to disapoint the kind Harry Potter, the generous Harry Potter, the Harry Potter who had not only defeated He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, but also the Ravenous Blarg Beast of Thraal, Dobby resigned himself to his face and struck a pose like a chair behind the table. Hopefully Harry Potter and his Wheezy would not notice the difference.

Little did Dobby realize that the chair that was missing was meant for Hagrid, Hogwart's half-giant groundskeeper. Much to Dobby's delight, Hagrid didn't notice the difference between Dobby and a real chair. Much to Dobby's dismay, he had forgotten the laws of physics and promptly went SPLAT! under Hagrid's enormous weight.
Rommel
and as Dobby welcomed the sweet kiss of Death..his last thought on earth was, Now I know why Master Harry never mixes scones with sulfuric acid
Drie
QUOTE (PlaidPhoenix @ Nov 1 2003, 02:25 PM)
I've never seen this thread before.... laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

"No no, this is not doing well for Harry Potter and his Wheezy!" Dobby exclaimed. Dobby looked high, Dobby looked low, Dobby looked near, Dobby looked far, but Dobby could not find the chair missing from the table. Not wanting to disapoint the kind Harry Potter, the generous Harry Potter, the Harry Potter who had not only defeated He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, but also the Ravenous Blarg Beast of Thraal, Dobby resigned himself to his face and struck a pose like a chair behind the table. Hopefully Harry Potter and his Wheezy would not notice the difference.


laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

Okay, reading this passage while drinking tea is not recommended!

Yoda
The big red button marked: 'Do not ever, at absolutely any cost, ever, push this button, ever, ever, ever, while inside this cave, ever, ever, ever, ever! PS: We really mean it.' sat merrily inside the cave.

Harry Potter and his friends sat merrily outside the cave, as Dobby merrily strolled inside the cave with instructions from Harry himself.

Yoda, BOOM (merrily)

PS: Not the best, but I'm a little...soaked (merrily bloody rain outside!)
Roxanne
These are kind of lame, but what can I say? I like limericks blushing.gif

There once was a house elf named Dobby
Who annoyed Harry P. as a hobby
One day he provoked
the green-eyed young bloke
The results were both gooey and gobby.


The house elf named Dobby went "zoom"
as he cleaned up the Gryf common room
In his haste to put right-us
Some Weasley detritus
Fred & George's latest made him go "boom"


Okay, you can quit wincing now - I'm done!

bag.gif Roxanne
Drie
QUOTE (Roxanne @ Nov 7 2003, 03:12 PM)
Okay, you can quit wincing now - I'm done!

bag.gif Roxanne

Stand tall and proud! Those were very clever ways to kill off Dobby.

thumbup1.gif
Sean
Dobby's feelings is hurt that everyone wants me dead. I'm going to work for Eowyn. She's in another series so I won't be seeing you again. Dobby notices his english has improved.
Sean
Dobby's feelings is hurt that everyone wants me dead. I'm going to work for Eowyn. She's in another series so I won't be seeing you again. Dobby notices his english has improved. Dobby sets up shop in Mirkwood and is translating all the Rowling books into elvish. Making much gold. He is going to talk to JKR about making him the hero of the seventh book but dies aftyer eating toomuch food at a hobbit elvenses. bag.gif
Willow
Dobby decided he could not let Hermione see Ron like this, all undressed and awful! wink.gif He hid up on the roof plan to jump down on hermion as she passed. Dobby noticed my coming up the corridor with Lavender they were laughing and doing impressions of a muggle programme...supperman? laugh.gif Dobby Jumped down on Hermione 'eeeeeurgh' said hermion as her hand pierced throught dobbys stomach, 'Ive got insides all over me thanks to you!'
Willow
wink.gif Oi! come on people i love all the little doddy stories! post post post
Plotter
First try. Let me know what you think!

---------

And it was yet another beautiful morning on the Hogwarts grounds. Through the little window in the kitchens, Dobby could see the gorgeous sunrise coming up over the forest's high trees. As he prepared breakfast for the students, he could not keep his eyes off this sight.

"Hurry up now, Dobby! You're going to make breakfast late again!" said another house elf.

"Yes, right away!" said Dobby, grabbing a pticher of pumkin juice in one hand and a plate of bacon in the other. As he walked, he continued to watch the sky.

My sky he thought, for something this precious cannot be shared by everyone, can it?
He saw the purple glow turn maroon, then orange, and finally yellow. What he did not see, however, was the fire place right in front of him.

:sound effect- fire crackling, Dobby screaming, and one house elf saying "Ot ho":
hockeygod
Very good Plotter!

I will now try my hand at this.

Dobby was walking into the Great Hall to tell Harry Potter of trouble. However, he didn't see Peeves, who hit him with a pile of sticks. At that precise moment, the doors to the Entrance Hall opened and Dobby got blown out onto the grounds. At that moment the Giant Squid stuck out a tentacle and ate Dobby, since Harry hadn't been by to give him some toast.

What do you guys think?
Drie
I wish I could claim this as my own!:

“Harry Potter,” Draco stated, almost certainly existing at the end of the hallway of almost certain peril.

“Draaaaaco Malfoy,” Harry pronounced.

“Haaaaarry Potter,” Draco declared.

“Draco Draco Malfoy,” Harry affirmed.

“Harry Harry Potter,” Draco proclaimed.

“Pikachu!” said a small yellow rodent. Harry blinked and then stepped on it. Millions of ten-year-olds wept bitterly.

“I will say good day to you, sir,” said Harry to Draco in a thoroughly condescending manner. He huffily turned his back on him.

Now, Draco was not one to take thoroughly condescending manners lightly, and so he narrowed his eyes and pulled out his wand. And that is when the fecal matter hit the oscillating device for circulating air.

“Myhairisprettierthanyoursum!” Draco screamed, pointing his wand at Harry. Luckily, Harry’s Matrix moves had improved greatly since the last story, and he quickly went into bullet time to avoid the spell. The wayward spell promptly hit Dobby the house elf, who just so happened to be there, instead. Luckily, Dobby was a CGI character and easily replaced by the good special effects people at Warner Bros.

“You fool!” cried the highly suspicious Mad-Eye Moody, who had just burst onto the scene. “He may be easily replaced, but those CGI effects cost good money! And now, to illustrate that I’m not actually the son of a respected member of the Ministry who went bad many years ago and fell into the service of Lord Voldemort then was convicted of crimes against humanity and sent to prison only to be switched with my dying mother so that I could live in the care of my father’s house elf under the Imperius curse for the rest of my days but now have escaped the clutches of my father and have captured the real Mad-Eye Moody so that I may use his hair as an ingredient in Polyjuice Potion to impersonate him for a whole year just so that I can get Harry to touch the Triwizard Cup which I will turn into a Portkey which doesn’t make a whole lot of sense but who the hell am I to argue with plot device, I will take Harry’s side. Blueberrylicious!” he cried, pointing his wand at Malfoy.

Draco turned into a giant blueberry.


This comes from SilverPhoenix25's newest parody (book 4) The Omlette of Desire, which you can read here.
Imogen
Classic!

I saw this bit of artwork by Red Scharlach and it made me think instantly of this thread!

I laughed out loud.

Imogen tongue.gif
Drie
QUOTE
I laughed out loud.

Imogen 


I did too! That's great! fing34.gif
Yoda
Most excellent imagery my friends

Yoda, who's been inspired by the bill and ted quote biggrin.gif
Drie
QUOTE (Yoda @ Jan 28 2004, 09:45 AM)
Most excellent imagery my friends

Yoda, who's been inspired by the bill and ted quote biggrin.gif

What have I inspired??? Poor Dobby . . . perhaps squashed by the telephone booth? teu45.gif (okay and how funny is it that this smile is labeld bart?)
Robert
Its Valentine's Day, and Dobbie was late for dinner in the Great Hall. He had special instructions from Harry Potter to bring a card to his love Ginny. Alas, Dobbie was running late and feared Harry's anger.

Just as he reached the door to the Great Hall, he heard a loud roar, then he was flattened by a bald tattooed teddy bear on a Harley-Davidson who cried "I'm outa here! Cape D'adge, here I come!" as he sped off into the night.

Poor Dobby, Road Kill!

Lawrence the Bear will return!

Robert devil.gif devil.gif
QuickHare
The small, over-excited figure of Dobby squeaked merrily down the main street known as Diagon Alley.
'Dobby will find the books Harry Potter needs. May be in here?'
As quick as Dobby is, he peered in to a shop to find a menagerie of animals.
'May be not,' Dobby squeaked.
However, outside, some stalls were set up. Looking at one of the stalls, Dobby found all the books Harry needed, as well one for himself entitled 'How to Talk in the First Person'. He attracted the attention of the stallholder, who mentioned how much the books cost.
'Okay,' replied Dobby, only to pause at the sight of the stallholder giving him a shocked look.
'No, no, no!' the stallholder started, 'I say ten, you say "Ten? I'll give you three'.'
'Okay,' said Dobby, desperate to get out of the pickle he was now in, 'Three.'
'Three for that? You must be mad!'
'Ok, four.'
'Now you're gettin' it,' encouraged the stallholder, 'Four? With a family to support?'
'Here's five,' hurried Dobby, finding a way out of the situation.

Just then, a spaceship came swooping down and grabbed him. He was now gobsmacked, standing in what seemed like the control centre for the whole craft.
Out of the window he could see many balls of colour against a starry black background.
The craft took a nose dived and accelerated towards the ball it had just come from, and Dobby was dropped. However, the navigators had miscalculted the position of the place they had picked Dobby up from and dropped him on to a nuclear waste site, puncturing a container and causing the biggest explosion ever known to man.

As the flames headed towards Dobby at an alarming rate, one thought raced through his tiny little mind.
'Crap.'
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